Sunday, May 22, 2011
Sunday, Feeling Overwhelmed
I think am rambling here. Focus, Linda. I need to wallow in my Strength and my Faith. I need to pray every minute (and sometimes I do) so that I am not overwhelmed. I cry and mourn and also mourn that my children aren't close to me and I work so hard to keep in touch with them and two of my sons get angry with me and don't respond at all. Timothy and Brendan were the only ones who called me or sent cards. I wonder if it is because T & B have children and know more about life now. Sigh. I'll never know but I don't want to go to my death with them holding grudges and I can't fix them, I know. I have been the best person I was able to be with what I had to work with and did a darn good job. But they don't know that. They didn't live my life. My heart hurts for all the pain in the world and for me and Timothy's children and for his brothers and Julie. Oh, God,, my heart hurrts. Time to pray. And thank God for the time that I had with my son. Better get busy and stop this whining. sigh.